"Love!" It's what you put in!

Seal and Hedi have ended, what most Hollywood insiders consider, a very romantic marriage. Seal announced the reason, "We have grown apart". What does that mean? A marriage is the joining of two people together and a commitment to stay together until death.

Will there be times that issues arise, yes. Will there be times you are on different sides of the argument, yes. Will there be times that you feel a little stale, yes. All of us feel those emotions from time to time and find that if we get over our needy selves the marriage continues to grow in depth of love.

If this statement is true then the marriage vows were never understood or were mere lip service. Growing together is an act of intention, it is Loving On Purpose.  Whether you are a star or a regular person we all have and need independence to pursue our work or hobbies or passions, they are part of what attracted us to our spouses. Being married does not kill our individuality, it means we have someone to share our wins and losses with, someone who knows us so well that they support us so that we become inter-dependant not independent.

In that state of inter-dependency you find yourself saying to yourself, "this could only better if she/he were here to share this moment with me". Loving On Purpose means you cannot grow apart because you grow together, in sickness or health, for richer or poorer and your love grows for the other person as you give your love to them.

Good friends of mine recently married for the second time each and in front of a very large crowd they said this as they placed the ring on the others finger, "with this ring I set you free to be the best person you can be". There is no growing apart, there is only being so self centered that you stop loving the other person with intention, and you ask the question what am I getting out of it. Love is never about what you get out, it is always about what you put in.